The Roof is on Fire


The time was now. Somebody had to go. I suspected that it wouldn’t be me. The last thing I recalled was when Roc gave me Tylenol and a glass of water. That was when we heard someone enter through the front door. To our surprise, it was Jeff. He spoke to us, then found the others and asked them to gather around. I wondered what was going on, because he looked to have something heavy on his mind. Maybe there was no fucking allowed in this house and Jaylin and Sylvia were about to get booted out. The rules mentioned nothing about intimacy, though, so I really wasn’t sure why Jeff was here.

Either way, we all spread out on the couch to listen in. Jeff scratched his head and raked his fingers through his blond hair.

“The time has come for someone to be voted out of Hell House. There are six of you, and all six of you will decide who that person will be.”

I shifted my eyes from one person to the next with much confusion on my face. All along, we thought that each person had to leave of their own free will, that no one could be voted out of here. This didn’t make sense. I guess the same concern was on everybody’s mind. We all spoke at once.

“What the fuck?” Roc said out loud. “You didn’t say all of that from jump.”

“I’m confused.” Chase shrugged. “Why vote?”

“Trickery,” Prince added. “This shit happens all the time.”

Jeff raised his hands to get our attention. “Okay, everyone. Calm down. From the beginning, we made it clear that there may be some twists and turns in this competition. This is one of them.”

I cocked my head back. “Well, I hope you don’t decide to do a twist when it comes to uppin’ the money. If you do, be prepared for me to twist your fuckin’ neck. The one thing I don’t play with is money.”

“Jada, the money situation is good.” Jeff cleared his throat. “But in order for you all to dwindle down to one, we must do it this way. So, take a minute to think about whom you all want voted out of here today.”

“Today,” Sylvia shouted. “Why today? It would be nice if you could give us a little more time to think about this.”

“Unfortunately not. You must decide immediately, and one-by-one, I need each of you to go over to the computer and email me the name of the person you want to leave. At 5:00 PM, I will email you that person’s profile and picture. Feel free to answer your fan mail before you leave, but after that, the person voted off must leave.”

“This is terrible,” I said. “I feel like I got to backstab somebody, and y’all already know I don’t get down like that.”

Jaylin stood and rubbed his hands together. “It’s the rules, baby. Learn to follow them.”

Without hesitating, he walked over to the computer. Logged in and typed in somebody’s name.

“Done,” he said, looking at Jeff.

My mouth dropped open. “Damn, it was that easy for you?”

He responded with a shrug. Afterward, Chase ran her trifling self over to the computer, logged in and did the same. She swiped her hands together and had the nerve to say, “Good riddance.”

Then Sylvia almost broke her neck rushing to the computer to login. She typed in a name, then hit the backspace key to make a correction. “Oops, sorry,” she said. She logged out and moved away from the computer.

“Y’all some cold muthafuckas.” Roc sat at the desk in deep thought. He pondered for a minute, then slowly typed in a name. He also appeared happy about his choice.

Now, it was Prince’s turn. I hadn’t moved because these fools came off giddy about what they had to do. Prince laughed when he typed in a name, then said, “Done deal. Be gone, Biatch!”

What the hell! Really? Like it or not, it was my turn. I moved slowly over to the computer desk with my lips poked out. After I sat at the desk, I tapped my leg, thinking hard about who I wanted to go home. I didn’t know whose name to type. I could think of at least one good reason why every person in this house should be sent packing. Some, I could think of several reasons. The decision didn’t come easy for me, and I couldn’t stop thinking about the money. Eventually, I forced myself to type in the name of the person I wanted to go home. I backed away feeling awkward, but hoping that the person leaving today wouldn’t be me.

“Thank you, everyone,” Jeff said. “Enjoy the rest of your day and say your goodbyes to everyone, just in case.”

No one said a word. The room fell silent and all we heard was the front door shut.

“Well,” Jaylin said, standing up and stretching. “It was fun while it lasted.”

Roc smiled and cocked his neck from side to side. “Yes it was, but somebody must go. Too bad it won’t be me.”

Prince slapped his hand against Roc’s. “I second that motion, my nigga. Won’t be me either.”

“What makes you all so sure?” Chase asked with a frown.

Roc’s eyes shifted to Jaylin, and his eyes shifted to Prince. Neither of them said anything else, leaving some of us on pins and needles for most of the day.

When five o’clock rolled around, we all surrounded the computer desk, gazing at the twenty-seven-inch monitor. The room was so quiet that the only thing you could hear was hearts beating. My palms were sweating and my stomach tightened when the person’s profile and picture came up on the screen. All eyes turned in the same direction. All I could say was, “Damn.” She ain’t have to go, but it was time for Sylvia to get the hell out of here!

Tears rushed to the rim of her eyes. She hurried to smack away a slow tear that rolled over her cheek. She swallowed hard and everyone waited for her to speak. Her eyes said it all; she was fuming. Her eyes were locked with Jaylin’s, and neither of them broke their intense gaze. It was a nail-biting situation, so I took this as an opportunity to speak up.

“Ooooo,” I said, looking at Jaylin with my hand on my hip. “After beatin’ her pussy like that, did you vote for her to leave?”

His eyes shifted to me. The sly smirk on his face said it all. I had voted for Sylvia too, only because she was trifling. It was a tossup between her and Chase. I chose Sylvia because of her heated sex session in the closet with Jaylin. I didn’t want her to have no more access to his goods and baby-making gravy.

While shaking my head, I pretended to be disgusted with Jaylin. “You did vote for her, didn’t you? Talk about dir-tee. Pussy don’t have no kind of value anymore. There was a time when a sista could get her mortgage paid for uppin’ it. Now, the goodies ain’t worth shit.”

“Depends on whose pussy it is,” Chase said with snap in her voice. “Some women don’t have it like that, while others do. Unfortunately, Sylvia, you don’t. So pack it up. You’re going home.”

Prince cocked his head back and sucked his teeth. “Soon, all of you peasants will be gone, so don’t nobody get comfortable.”

He walked away after Chase advised him to kiss her ass. She then cut her eyes at Sylvia. “Look. I voted for you as well, but don’t take it personal. You played yourself. I did my best to try and warn you about going there with Jaylin. You never should have trusted him.”

Sylvia put up her hand near Chase’s face to silence her. “Chase, I don’t want to hear your mouth right now. You know what you can do for me? You can get the heck away from me and go figure out something else to do with your time left here, other than chase after dick around this house.”

“Don’t be mad at me because playing by your own rules didn’t work out. I’m not going to argue with you. Doing so will only prolong your stay, so goodbye.”

Chase stormed away. Sylvia went into the kitchen, where Jaylin had moved to. I followed to be nosey.

“You voted for me?” she said with raised brows, directing her question to Jaylin.

When an irritated look washed across his face, I could tell this conversation was about to get painful for her. I tried to help by adding my two cents again.

“Duh, no. He voted for yo mama, not you. It’s all the same, Sylvia, so why don’t you stop embarrassin’ yourself and go.”

She swung around and lashed out at me. “Stay out of this, Jada! Mind your own business. Please!”

“Don’t raise your voice at me, heifer. I know you’re upset, but you’d better focus your anger on the man who broke yo back and now wants you out of the house! If anything, you need to stop searchin’ for answers and do your best to leave here with some kind of diggity.”

“It’s dignity, you dumb, ghetto whore. I don’t need help from somebody like you, so go somewhere and stuff yourself with cheesecake and hot apple pie. I got this. Trust me, I do.”

I tightened my fists, but before I could crack that bitch upside her head, Roc grabbed my waist, pulling me away from her. All I could do was swing at the air.

“None of that, ma,” he said, “Chill out.”

“You need to let her go.” Sylvia crossed her arms and pursed her lips. “She’s a lot of mouth with very little action. All that crap you’re doing doesn’t scare me, and if you wanted to break away from Roc you could.”

I loved the feel of Roc’s strong arms secured around my waist. His touch made me relax a little. Besides, the real Sylvia was about to show up. The classy-lady act had flown out the window, and she was about to embarrass herself even more.

I twisted and turned to get away from Roc, but his grip was too tight for real. All I wanted to do was smack Sylvia for being so stupid, but he was preventing that from happening.

“You’re real lucky,” I hissed. “And only if I had a shoe.”

Sylvia waved my threat off and looked at Roc. “I guess you voted for me too, huh?”

He didn’t hesitate to answer. “Sorry, ma, but you made yourself an easy target. When I say don’t take it personal, I mean that shit. See you at the reunion show. I hope you don’t come strapped to that mutha.”

Sylvia shrugged. “No need to. I guess you did what you felt you had to do.”

Roc nodded and kept a tight hold on me as we made our way outside. I lifted my middle finger at Sylvia, positive that she knew what to do with it. She was now left to deal with Jaylin who had proven himself to be a plotting, cold motherfucker with no remorse.