HOW TO BE FAMOUS

 

  “Roar!”

  “ROAR!”

  “ROARRR!”

  Heidi Heckelbeck and her best friend Lucy Lancaster squealed and ran across the playground. They were playing Cheese Dinosaur Tag.

   

  Stanley Stonewrecker dressed like a dinosaur. The rest of the class—or, at least, those who were playing—was the cheese. And, of course, in this game the dinosaur loves cheese and won’t stop until he gets some.

  “He’ll never find us under here,” Lucy whispered.

   

  Heidi plunked onto the ground and accidentally bumped into a pair of pink polka-dot flats under the table. Heidi stared fearfully at the shoes because she knew exactly who they belonged to—Melanie Maplethorpe, her least favorite girl in the class.

   

  Melanie peered under the table and glared at Heidi. “What do you think you’re doing?” she cried, pushing the toe of her shoe into Heidi’s side.

  “Sorry,” said Heidi. She dragged out the word like saw-ree.

   

   

  Then Lucy noticed Melanie had a magazine in her hand.

  “What are you reading?” asked Lucy, trying to change the mood under the table.

  Melanie turned her new magazine around so Lucy and Heidi could see the cover.

  “I’m reading She-She magazine,” Melanie said, lightening up. “It’s my absolute favorite.” She-She magazine had all the latest tween fashions and celebrity gossip.

   

  “This SPECIAL issue has advice on how to be FAMOUS,” Melanie went on. “And if there’s one thing I want to be, it’s FAMOUS!”

  Then Melanie slid underneath the table beside the girls.

   

  “Do you want to hear some tips on how to be famous?” Melanie asked.

   

  Heidi and Lucy looked at each other in surprise. Melanie rarely ever shared anything, except maybe insults.

  “Okay, sure!” Lucy said.

   

  Melanie smiled and opened up her magazine. “Okay. ‘Tip number one,’ ” she began. “ ‘When you’re famous, you always have to dress like you’re walking on a runway—that’s because everyone wants to take your picture.’ ”

   

  Melanie showed celebrities posing for pictures. Then she turned the page.

  “ ‘Tip number two: You’ll want your fans to think you’re normal,’ so you have to shop for everyday things, like oranges.”

  Melanie showed a picture of a pretty girl in dark glasses picking an orange from an orange display.

   

  “ ‘Tip number three,’ ” Melanie said. “ ‘You really have to like FANCY things.’ This one’s super-easy for me because I LOVE fancy things. Like, one time I ate SUSHI. That’s very fancy.”

   

  Heidi and Lucy nodded.

   

   

  “Last but not least,” Melanie went on, “ ‘tip number four: You have to be okay with people being completely jealous of your perfect, amazing superstar life.’ ” Then she closed her magazine and sighed loudly. “And I’m totally fine with that.”

  Then, out of nowhere, Stanley’s face appeared under the table.

  “ROAR!!!”

   

  The girls screamed. Heidi and Lucy crawled away as fast as they could and hid behind a tree. Heidi peeked out from behind the trunk.

   

  Stanley waved over to Melanie. “Hi! Are you playing?” he asked her.

  Melanie just stuck her nose back in her magazine. “No, I am not. Because famous stars DO NOT ever play Cheese Dinosaur Tag.”

   

  Then Heidi turned to Lucy. “Wow, I’m sure glad I’M not famous,” she said, “because I LOVE to play Cheese Dinosaur Tag!”